


The bane of existence

by Idjit_01



Series: Multifandom febuwhump bc January sucked [7]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: "who are you?", Confused Jack Kline, Day 12, Emotionally Repressed Dean Winchester, FebuWhump2021, Febuwhump, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Hurt Jack Kline, Sam Winchester is Jack Kline's Parent, Whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-12
Updated: 2021-02-12
Packaged: 2021-03-12 08:15:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29381937
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Idjit_01/pseuds/Idjit_01
Summary: Prompt #day 12: "who are you?"Since Jack was born the prevalent question everyone would ask was "what are you?" as if he was some creature in a circus exhibit to either admire or fear.
Relationships: Castiel & Jack Kline, Jack Kline & Dean Winchester, Jack Kline & Original Character(s), Jack Kline & Sam Winchester
Series: Multifandom febuwhump bc January sucked [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2140680
Kudos: 10
Collections: febuwhump 2021





	The bane of existence

Since Jack was born the prevalent question everyone would ask was " _what are you?_ " as if he was some creature in a circus exhibit to either admire or fear.

If anyone ever wondered anything else about him it was always something like _"where do you come from?"_ or _"what are you gonna do next?"._ It was always about his family, born or acquired, about his abilities or about anything that could tell them about the danger he posed to everyone else.

He didn't think anything of it. It was normal.

He did hear the questions " _who are you?_ " or " _who do you think you are?_ ", but it was always on hunts or cases; just people looking for their name and level of authority where they were.

So it didn't take him by surprise when people asked him questions like that; he always knew what they wanted to hear.

One day, though, they were somewhere in who-knows-were on a case Jack wasn't allowed to participate in and he was doing research in the library while he waited for the Winchesters to return and someone sat beside him.

He was reading something about the Egypcians and, when the teenager saw what he was reading, they looked at him with pity.

"Ugh, still doing schoolwork? Shouldn't you be done? What are you, like, twenty?"

Jack looked up at them confused. "This is not for school." He explained.

"Ugh, so you are one of those nerds?" They asked irritated, "ew, get out of here."

Jack frowned, but stood up and left, adding a mental note to ask Sam or Dean about it.

He left the library and sat on the sidewalk.

He was observing two doves fight for a piece of bread when someone dropped beside him. They had some sort of rolled paper between their fingers and looked at him with a daze. 

"Hey, 'want some?" They asked.

He shrugged and the person beside him passed him the thing, Jack coughing the moment it touched his lips and smoke got into his eyes mouth. The person laughed.

"This one's free 'cause you're new and I'm bored, but the next one's on you."

Jack shrugged again and looked away. "I don't want another one."

"Trust me, you'll change your mind." The other person nodded to themselves. Then, after taking another drag, they laid backwards on their elbows and squinted their eyes towards Jack.

"So, who are you?"

Jack turned to them then and lifted his hand in greeting. "Hi. I'm Jack."

"Okay." The other answer and took Jack's hand, turning Jack's move into a handshake. "Name's Max." They looked away as they smoked a bit more quietly and then turned toward Jack, tapping his shoulder to get his attention.

"But, like. Who are you? Tell me something 'bout ya. Come on, I shared my smoke with ya."

"I didn't like it." Jack answered, eyes squinting and thinking of going back to the motel room he had been left in in the first place. "What do you mean?"

"I don't know. Like, what do you like or why do you do stuff. What makes you who you are." Max answered. They closed their eyes and smiled. "Ugh. I'm tired. And hungry. 'think I got the munchies." They stood up on wobbly legs and chuckled. "Coming?" They asked.

Jack shook his head and stood up as well.

"Your loss. See ya' around." Max said, hands in his pockets, and walked away without sparing another glance at Jack. 

That night Jack couldn't sleep. The question going round and round in his mind. _Who are you? What makes you who you are?_ He stood up and walked towards the kitchen area of their small room.

Without turning on the light, he opened the fridge and looked in it mindlessly until he felt a hand on his right shoulder.

"Jack? Are you alright?" Sam asked, in his grave concerned voice he already knew two well.

"I'm fine." He answered with a sigh.

Sam looked at him a bit like he used to look at Dean sometimes, some way that looked like he was trying to convey 'don't bullshit me' and 'I'm worried about you' at the same time. "Are you sure?"

"It's just..." He relented, turning around and closing the door behind him. "Someone asked me earlier who I was, but not as in my name like people usually do. He was asking me what I thought made me me and I can't stop thinking about it." He looked up at Sam and tilted his head. "Sam, who do you think I am?"

"Well," Sam said, exhaling loudly and long as if to gain a few more moments to ponder on his answer. "I don't think I can answer that for you. Only you can."

"But you're always saying how you love _'me for me_ ' and not because of my powers, so what so you mean by that if you don't know who I am?"

Sam sighed again before talking again. "I mean that I love you for your thoughts and actions and for you being here. I mean I don't love you for what you are useful for. But, Jack, listen. I didn't mean that I don't know you. I meant to say that you're the only one who can decide who you are for yourself. I can't tell you that."

Jack tilted his head further and nodded, still confused. "Okay." He walked back to the sofa and took a book that was laying around. "You should go back to sleep. It's still early."

Sam smiled and walked towards the bathroom. "You should too. And Jack? Just in case, you should know you're not your mom or your dad. You're you. You don't have to be follow their steps or think you're bad because Lucifer was."

The next morning Jack waited for Sam to leave to approach Dean.

"Dean? Can I ask you something?"

Dean looked up grumpily from his coffee and stared at him expectantly.

"Who would you say I am?"

Dean rolled his eyes. "You're Jack."

"Yeah, but _who_ am I?"

"Have you been reading some crappy-touchy-feely pamphlet while we were on the case? Why does it matter? Just, shut up. You wanna talk about that crap, talk to Sammy. He's all for that kind of bullshit."

Dean lifted the cup and emptied it before standing up and taking his gun out to clean it while he waited for Sam to return from his run.

Jack scrutinized the mirror in search of an answer. _Who am I? How can I continue doing anything without knowing who I am? How should I know what's right and what's wrong or what to choose if I don't know who I am?_

"Cas?" He whispered. He clenched the T-shirt between his fingers and felt a few tears escape his eyes. "Cas, where are you? I need you. _Dad._ "

**Author's Note:**

> I was between writing this or something about amnesia, but this came more natural to me. I haven't written much about Jack because he's a teen who's actually about 3yo but who's been given knowledge about everything to survive, so his headspace confuses me a lot and I don't really know how to write from his POV.
> 
> But I think this question could fit him in any way and any age, so here it is.
> 
> I really hope you enjoyed it, and don't forget to take care of yourselves.
> 
> If you have any suggestions for the next prompts, let me know.


End file.
